"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." --Stephen R. Covey
I open with this quote because most people know Stephen Covey for his smash hit 7 Habits. The fact the book series was such a success is attributed to our inner desire to improve, to grow and for personal advancement.
In Arianna Huffington’s book, Thrive, she says that empathy is being able to listen and to take the time to actually put ones self in a place of understanding for what is being told.
Not only would this help us build empathy, but by stretching our minds it is like studying text or reading a book - we learn and imagine and expand our thought.
So, why is it so many do not listen? Our ego takes over and before time runs out we must assert our opinions and be right or be heard and get noticed. Patience has no place in this hurried society. This is how we get ahead in the world, not by understanding, we justify.
"Most of the successful people I've known are the ones who do more listening than talking." --Bernard Baruch
After my yoga class yesterday I did the usual: I dropped my towel and mat in the bins for cleaning, entered the locker room, searched briefly for my locker (as I almost always forget which one is exactly mine since they all look alike with digipads rather than individual locks), changed and went outside to unlock my bike. There was a girl on her phone with her back to me while I was minding my own business looking up the address to the New Movement Theater and getting out my lock keys.
"Hi!" she exclaimed enthusiastically with a bright smile, "I'm J - I was helping out in class today. How did you like class?"
"Oh, hey!" I returned and I thanked her for her assists.
The instructor had given a metaphor about his flowers looking kind of sad at home and how his mom told him he should just talk to his flowers to perk them up a bit. Like Masaru Emoto spoke to water, she suggested he speak to his plants.